let me start out by jumping around and say that first, it is fun to write to an imaginary audience.
I feel quite liberated.
And secondly: I feel really strange right now. Just got home from work and my apartment is so hot, I am completely flush and shaking a little. So while writing this blog I am either, crazy from the heat, got a contact high from a co-worker who has been coming down off of this weird drug I have never heard of, or maybe the incense I am burning right now that I bought of the crackhead in the middle of 52nd street at 2am was laced.
And although it does feel good to embellish anonymously and freely, you too might think I was tripping if you saw how tragically I just put some pasta in boiling water. Cuz there is now dry pasta on every counter in my tiny kitchen.
Hmmm. story. yes. so
needless to say in the last few years, I had fallen way out of touch with radio hip-hop.
but I'm getting back on track.
Here in Philly, we listen to POWER 99 and we love it.
But now that I am grown, I've switched over to 105.3. Which is the R&B station.
So that is my excuse for not having heard the Drake song, "Sweat Pants Hair Tie."
What is even better is how I found out about this song...
I work at a Salad Place. That's right, I sling the OG Sweet Green all day long.
In fact "thug life" is part of our company's branding.
Quiet as kept, I just met the owners today and they are not very thuggish at all.
Their pants like fit without a belt and stuff.
Anywho, this one day, a co-worker and I were talking about boys, I mean, men.
She said something about being self conscious for not being all pretty-fied around her new dude.
So I said, "honey, you really don't need to worry about that. Men like us best when we are in sweats, smellin all stinky with our hair messed up."
And then a male co-worker chimed in, "yeah, like that Drake song, sweat pants, hair tie."
So I was like, "forreal there's a song about that? that's so funny."
Cuz really I learned the simple fact about the sweat pants thing from my ex.
He'd be all up in my grill when I was chillin in the crib on a sunday with a fuzz head.
Then when I would be all dolled up ready to go out with the girls, he'd tell me how weird I looked.
So yeah, here it is.
And yeah, as if you needed proof that this is the case, I have another story.
Today, on my way home, I stopped at the Hess Gas station by my house to vacuum out the car.
I was lookin tired. Cuz slingin salads is hard work.
powder on my face faded. hair fuzzy from the work hat I was wearing all day.
Crusty salad dressing covered workshirt and a sweatshirt with a hole in it.
So I am over by the vacuum, picking trash out of my car, and I get, that's right, asked out to dinner.
Uh huh.
True story.
No wonder this track made Drake's career.
Only thing is.....Fellas:
Even if you think your girl looks all weird when she's dolled up and on her way out the door, you still have to tell her she looks Fyne, because she just spent like an hour puttin that smokey eye on, so if you don't "notice," then you might not be gettin any booty later on.
Just sayin
No comments:
Post a Comment