Wednesday, February 5, 2014

On Chet Faker

Honestly folks,
It's all you can do when u feel like a transplant who has lived in a foreign land for 15 years, but still can't speak the language. I have immersed myself in pop culture and disheveleld love affairs as distractions for so long, when in the end, I inevetably I still feel inevitably, like a stranger in a strange land. Grown tired of searching for Paul America, I remain completely disheveled with only this to offer.
God bless all the free time for introspection in this town,  as to find this little gem.
He calls himself Chet Faker and I can see why. He is voice is incredible, yes, but does it melt me like butter as Chet Baker would? I could only hope so.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Rippling Back for a Sec

And so here we go!
Just got a new battery for my computer.
Been needing one ever since I threw up on my computer a couple years back.
It was the night I wrote to Brooker Wood about riding Arabian horses in the dessert.
There's a post about it on here somewhere.
And let me tell you, I did have a moment earlier today, when this Zaki Ibrahim song came on my iTunes, that reminded me of that whole time. Back when I was in fact, taking those painfully slow, baby steps towards getting back in the game, maybe finding some love.
Finding myself utterly crushing on a hippie rapper dude that reminded me so much of Kenny that I couldn't decide whether to fall in love or keep him close as a friend.
And so in this contemplation drank almost a whole bottle of the Kracken and threw up on my computer, not before reaching out to my crush with a disheveled sentiment about riding horses in the dessert.
This Zaki Ibrahim song reminds me of those times.
I wept for my innocence when I heard it today.
I have made a huge go of it, since then, with this whole love thing.
Only at this point to be, not jaded, but sadly, back to having no time in my schedule for the awkward process of meeting someone new, should I call?...should I text?...or wait for him to holler?...
and not a thick enough skin to tolerate the slightest hint of game playing.
Oh that girl, the innocent one, scared to death, but still mustering the inebriated courage to put herself out there in hopes of maybe finding someone to occasionally cook dinner for or to get carried out of the bar by.
Love that girl. But she ain't here no more. Let's pour a little liquor out for her gentle soul.
Oh and in case you were wondering, Brooker Wood and I have become friends after all.
He even texted me on my birthday! And although I get it that he and I do best as friends,
I still geeked a little. :-)

On Draft

If there was a time for my on-line army to support me. then I suppose that time is now.
Considering I have practically left this site for dead, how could I expect my devouted
following to rally?
However, when have I ever allowed myself to need validation from followers to post what I post!
And so to you, the many I entitle the "Audience of One...."
Ellipse, ellipse, ellipse.
to fill in the blanks, I can only bring y'all up to date by saying...I am drunk!
My mother recently passed away, and that is a Shitty thing.
Leaving me more disheveled than ever, if only in the fact that, I am required these days,
to not be disheveled.
To live up to her expectations, or at least, Honour her memory.
And all I have to say is that, I remain.
Completely.
Edie Sedgwick on the whole matter.
Determined to find out where the hell Paul America is, before my own demise.
And so, if I were to dedicate a song to my whole plight, this may be it,
for I know nothing else, but to discover through my own indescretion, clarity in the whole matter.
I give to you, this slightly out of date banger.

Gone are the Broken Eyes




Hey Y'all
Scrolling over this sad and lonely blog, I have come to realize one thing. The whole past year while
I was going 100% on the Kenny Muthafucka in real time, I completely abandoned my writings on here, which are, completely therapeutic and still probably the best way to expose my thoughts into the disheveled matters of my life.
So, that being said, I hereby declare that from now on, no more looking for Kenny in real time.
I mean I'm not saying he can't holler if he wants, but a Prom Queen don't chase, no matter how disheveled.
Ok, well I am willing to admit that most of the chasing does occur while in a disheveled state.
Like how I am convinced that he and I belong together and so call him just after pounding a
6-pack of Hoegaarden.
Or like how he professed his Love for me, said I was his girl,  and told me he was  coming all the way from Cali to Philly for a visit just to bang me...three days into  his 5 day birthday bender.
Oh what a pair. Do you see why I've allowed myself to hold on?
I love Us.
But hey, lots of things have happened lately and so I must put the Kenny down and get back to my tales. Because honestly, I am more disheveled than ever! 
2013 was the year of the Kenny and was amazing, intense, and changed me forever.
2014 tho, is no more looking for Kenny fuck it, let's look for something else.


Sunday, October 27, 2013

She's Ba-aaaack!!!

Hey Y'all.
Know I haven't been on here for a long time.
You see....I was dealing with the Kenny MuthaFucka in real time y'all.
In real time y'all. Had to see.
That's my shit. From another lifetime.
~And you know what came out of it. Today. On this day.
The Original Kenny Muthafucka himeself's b-day?
This beautiful tune, right here.
God, if this is not the tune to bring me back to life after going in deep for my K-Love.
Bless!
However Edie Sedgewick I may feel at this moment, it is my boyfriend Movados that is
holding me down.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Really Explicit

Been feeling a bit Edie Sedgwick again lately.
Like I'm about to be living in a tent in the deep end of an empty pool out in Cali somewhere. Completely disheveled of course. Topless and looking for my lipstick.
Going on and on about my old boyfriend Paul America.
So these pics are right on time!
Deep thoughts of a Disheveled Prom Queen, talkin bout meant to happen. !

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Having an ADHD moment

So when you're like me, it takes great effort to stay focused. Now we could blame the drugs, but I say they help. And they're wearing off. That's why I am checking tumblr in the middle of watching a show on Hulu. And it's not even a commercial on why I'm doing it.
Then I click pause on Hulu so I can watch this.
And Ras G's beat is bending my brain instantly. And since I can't resist big upping a female rapper,
let's hear it for Eagle Nebula! I love these women coming out of LA. Defying stereotypes left and right. She got that west coast earthy thing going on with a city edge. BUt I keep asking myself is this the Gangsta Goddess Medusa herself? Not unless she's callin herself Eagle Nebula these days.
But you know they ride together.
Duh duh na na!