Over Like a Fat Rat

I have been sitting on this gem of a story for a couple weeks now, so let's go head and tell it.
So. Are we up to speed on this whole notion that I should be driving a blue truck?
Well anyway. Yes. I gotta thing for lil blue trucks. LUV style, you know. I want one.
No reason to own a truck. which I guess is why I just want a little one.

Next is how I have developed the habit of snapping pics of cars I dig. Posting them up on the internet here or there. And so launching into the story here. This past year, I have been noting the trend of flat paint colors on cars all over town. So when I saw this lil blue truck done up in flat blue, I had a wtf moment, had to pull over and snap a pic. Cuz we all know how I feel about Electric Blue.
Pardon the saturation here, the photo was taken at about 3 in the morning with a cell phone.
Basically, it was dark as shit so I saturated the crap out of it in Photoshop for you to bring out the lines and color of the car. Um. Yum. I'd be lookin cute in this, no?

 If you have ever taken a gorilla photo of a car, you know that to get a good angle on the vehicle in the shot, I was pretty much standing in the middle of the street. So yeah, standing in the street a little bent over to taking these photos. Naturally, a dude pulls up and starts talking to me.
I tell him I like taking pictures of cars and so somehow this inspires him to begin courting me.
Right then and there. 3am. Now, if he hadn't said the words, "after hours reggae club," I would have been on my merry way. But he said the magic words, so I hopped in my car and followed him up the street to this club.

Which I had thought for years was a contracting supply place. Turns out after hours club? Brilliant. Cuz you had me fooled. So here we go. All along the way he is tryna impress me with this or that thing about himself. Reasons why I should be his girl, I suppose. Cuz I'm either a gold digga or lookin for a new pimp, right?
But hey, he got me in da Club. Got me a drink and then started buying rounds for some ladies at the bar.  I been hanging with shady types for enough years to know when to turn a blind eye to whatever he's up to. Got my own ride, etc. and live 5 min away, so I'm doing my own thing.

And let me tell you, luck was on my side, cuz as a result of my disheveledness of standing in the middle of the street taking a pic of a lil blue truck, I ended up in da Club standing right next to none other than.....my Top Crush! Yeah that's right.  There. He. Was. And I was perfectly nice from a couple shots of Bulleit and couple beers before I got there. Great night. Great night.

Turns out, letting yourself get picked up in the street and taken to the club at 3am does have its advantages. My crush and I were vibin it up in the spot. Being nice to each other as can be, but of course the situation got disheveled. Slim Shady (my date) comes up suddenly and tells me to grab my coat, cuz someone's got a piece and we gotta leave. I'm looking around at how happy everyone is, but ok. So we bounce. Before me n my crush get to exchange digits.

Once we get outside, Mr. Important is right back to selling me the Brooklyn bridge talking bout how he vacations in Brazil and how he got to go check on his new trap if we aint gonna hang so I should hurry up and stop gaming on him cuz he aint got time for that. so I hop in my ride and peace out.
Cuz what? Was he thinkin he was about to get over like a fat rat? Buy my ticket, my drinks.
But if you being bossy and trumpin too hard, is when imma remind you, I'm not a hooker, I just play one on tv. Smoochez.